Voicing Grief

Welcome to the launch of my new thing!  My hope is that my writing and musings will have some meaning to many or at least a bit of meaning to some.  These articles may or may not follow rhyme or reason.  Yes, they will be spiritual and they will also be mine so they are likely to follow whatever particular path I am on for the day.

I’m not trying to produce converts or instill deeper core values into anyone.  I do have an agenda, however. I admit it.  Set in my heart at a tender age was the desire to help and inspire others through  writing, to be in the public eye and do good.  Sometimes I may write about a prophetic dream.  Another time I may record a heavenly vision or a word from the Lord.  I would not  be surprised if all of the above shows up on the same page either sprinkled, smattered, or littered with Scripture, or perhaps not.

Not everyone will agree with everything I share and that’s ok.  I may have a view opposing the many but I’m good with that too.  I will not try to be overtly offensive but neither will I try to censure my thoughts and feelings here, for this is my thing.  I will be real and be myself, with my own voice.  I truly hope this goal can be accomplished.

I told a friend, “Give a girl her voice and she will speak, consistently and loudly.”  And indeed, I shall.  I will honor the gift of my own voice and I will use it to bring glory to the Lord.

I will begin this new adventure, aside from the prelude, by remembering those who I have called friend in the past and saying, “Thank you.”

There have been many, it seems, who have fallen by the wayside.  In the last couple of years I have ‘lost’ friends who I still hold dear.  One taught me acceptance and endurance during hardship.  Another taught me love doesn’t fade with time or distance.  Still another taught me boldness and bravery without limits or boundaries.  One more taught me to hold on to the promises of the Lord, for all may be restored.

From these losses I have learned to grieve even when death is not involved.  That may seem a strange statement.  It did to me in the beginning.  But grief and loss is so much more than death.  A future without some of the past can be painful and must be taken account of, therefore grief.

But even as in the death of a loved one, the loss of a friend or a plan must be looked at.  We must gaze at it intensely and feel the pain of it’s passing in order to move on.  During this process we will remember some of the bad things, any disagreements or arguments, but we’ll also remember the good things, such as love, acceptance, boldness, and endurance.

Yes, I’ll be sad for the loss, perhaps for quite some time more.  But I’ll not regret the friendships or the lovely lessons I’ve learned.  I’ll not be angry at the passing but instead I’ll remember the days with fondness and I’ll continue to pray for those I still love in their absence.

This particular thing is sometimes hard to apply, praying during a grief such as a friend leaving.  Sometimes my brain and my heart wants to lash out and scream, “Why did you leave?  How could you after all we’ve been through?”  I’m not the only one, right?

Yet, I also must remember sometimes the Lord has plans for me and plans for others which don’t necessarily line up on the same plane.  My calling may be here and theirs may be way over there.  So peace must be made and peace must dwell within my heart.

So I grieve whenever grief arises because I must be fit for duty.  I must serve whenever service arises, not because my Lord demands it but because Love compels me to serve and I want to be wise, compassionate, gracious, merciful, and Spirit-led as I serve.

Jeannie B. Wilbourn

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